Pin-It Saturday: It’s Okay to Dream

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This week I decided to go about this a little differently. I wanted to share something inspiring rather than something about writing.

To print: Don't quit your day dream

Dreams are what carries us through the darkest moments in our lives. It’s only thing that keeps me going some days. Who ever tells you to get your head out of the clouds is just jealous because they don’t know what it’s like to be lost in a dream. A dream that one day could be reality.

And until my dreams become my reality, I will just keep on floating above the clouds.

Toodles

Reading in Public

marry him. marry him now.

This is going to be short and sweet. Because it’s Friday and I saw this picture and…well I couldn’t think of anything else anymore so this is where my mind goes.

As most of you know (since I mention it all the time) I am single. Actually, I have been single all of my life, unless you count the two internet relationships I had, which they were so short lived I don’t count them. I have never been on a date, never kissed a boy, never held hands with a boy. Yeah, I am basically Josie from “Never Been Kissed,” only 5 years later after the boy never showed up on the pitchers mound to kiss me. Yeah…that dream sailed long ago.

Sorry, what was I saying?

Oh right. I dream all the time of walking into a bookstore, browsing the books, and grabbing for the same book the same time as the cute guy who has been just as lost in the books as I have. Our gazes lock and it’s love at first sight. I giggle, he hands me the book, and we talk about the author or the book itself. When we leave, we have exchanged numbers and possibly plan on meeting up at a coffee shop for tea…you know, for our first date.

Then it will all spiral from there. On my days off work we are together, either at my house or his. We are either reading, or he is reading (or playing games) while I am working on my novel. We will watch cheesy horror movies together (because that is one of the must haves for my future boyfriend, he has to like horror movies). We will nerd over our favorite fandoms and have Netflix marathons.

And let’s not forget all the time we will spend in bookstores, picking out books and building our perfect library.

And this is probably why I am still single. I dream too much and I am told every day that love doesn’t happen like it does in the movies. But I will hold out until someone comes close to what I am looking for. He has to exist somewhere…right?

Maybe I need to start reading more in public.

Toodles

Dream a Little Dream

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I had one of the most amazing dreams last night. I didn’t want to get out of bed this morning because I wanted to continue the dream. I wanted to see what would happen and where the story would go. But I woke up already knowing where it would go.

The dream was about two best friends. A girl with long blond hair and a passion for art. A boy who comes from a troubled past, working hard to earn a dollar. His current job has something to do with fire…I wasn’t sure what it was all about. He worked in a dungeon and there was always a chance of fire.

Gabriel and Claire. They needed names and after a quick search these two names fit like gloves.

Gabriel and Claire grew up together. They were fast friends in pre-school.

Gabriel always loved Claire, but she had a boyfriend, she always had a boyfriend. She was beautiful and popular. But she loved Gabriel and never left him. Even when her “popular” friends sneered at him, Claire stood up for Gabriel. Even in high school when peer pressure told them they should not be friends. They could not be separated, not even by the dark forces of teenage hormones.

Gabriel worked hard everyday, even thought high school, to make something of himself. Something that was worthy of Claire. Claire only waited for him to realize that he was already worthy of her. She had loved him since the day her mother passed away.  Out of all of her friends, Gabriel was the only one that stuck by her side and let her cry. He didn’t tell her everything would be okay. He didn’t tense when she cried. And when she had to leave the movie theater because something reminded her of her mom, Gabriel loaded her up in his truck and took her to the river.

It was bound to happen. They fall in love, it was written in the stars. But Claire waited for Gabriel to be ready.

The Actual Dream

He finally called her, told her that he needed to speak with her. She rushed to his apartment. A small room within the cavern that he was working. He had tried to clean up before she got there, but something had caught on fire…again…and his shirt had been burned. He was changing shirts when she came in and she gasped at the bleeding cuts on his arms.

He brushed her off, telling her that it was something that always happened. It was a hazard of the job. Claire smiled and lay down in the floor, patting the floor beside her. Gabriel lay down, just far enough to where Claire could not reach him.

“Why are you so far away?” She asked him.  He only shrugs. “You should be by my side, always.” She whispered.

Surprise caught in Gabriel’s eyes. Claire knew why he had called her. He moved closer to her and Claire rested her head on his chest. “How did you know?” He asked with a smile.

“I have always known. I just had to wait for you to work up the nerve.” She looked up at him. “If you had waited too much longer, I would have had to beat it out of you.” She laughed. Gabriel came up to meet her lips, a kiss that had been in the making for years. A kiss that would seal their fate. Claire kissed him back, softly, there was no need to rush, they had all of their lives together.

A fire broke up, pulling the two away again as they rushed to put out the fires. Claire was laughing which caused Gabriel to laugh. But the laughter was interrupted as an explosion sounded, blasting out part of the wall and a guy with a ski mask jumps out.

“This can’t happen.” He said as he ran from the room.

Gabriel and Claire didn’t have time to chase the guy before something in the wall caught their attention. It was a stash of lost art.

One photo caught Claire’s attention. It was small and almost morbid, but she saw herself and Gabriel. She held up the picture of two embracing skeletons, with two skeleton children at their sides. “This reminds me of us.” Claire told Gabriel.

He understood and smiled. “You want children?”

“Yeah, someday.” She sat the picture down and looked away. “But only with you.”

As they riffled through the paintings Claire sat aside the ones she knew. They would get a reward for finding the paintings. A very hefty reward that could carry them through the rest of their life.

The End

Okay, not really the end. But I think I am going to run with this dream. See what I can do with it. It left me feeling something. It was a happy dream, but there was something more to it. Something underlining the events that took place. Like…why did the one guy jump out and say “This can’t happen?” I also want to explore more about Gabriel and Claire’s lives. How old was Claire when her mother died? What happened to Gabriel’s parents? So many questions!

Have you had any dreams that you have used for a story?

Meet Again 2

I Like to Dream Big

When I was a kid I used to tell people, every one I came across, that I was going to be the first female president. Of course, I was also going to be a doctor, pediatrician, veterinarian, and a lawyer. I wanted to do it all, and I was convinced that I could.

At some point I changed my mind.  I think it might have been all the time I would have to spend in school.  Once I hit high school I was over the whole school thing.  Now I want to be a best selling author, pastry chef, bakery owner, computer technician (with a compute repair shop), and a health nut/health and fitness instructor.  I have always wanted to do more than an average day would allow me, but there are moments where I really think I can do all I want.  I will always believe I can do everything on my to do list.

Even though my dreams changed at some point (except being a writer, I started as a story teller) it didn’t stop me from dreaming and imagining what it would be like to be president.  Not exactly what it would be like, but what I would do if I was in the position.  I get so angry about things in the world that I can’t help but to imagine all the things I would change.

I will just name a few things, and please, no hate.  I know how things work, but that doesn’t stop me from dreaming and pretending I live in a different world.

If I was president, the first thing I would do would implement solar roadways.  Construction would start immediatly.  Don’t know what that is?  Take a look at the video, it’s really worth the few minutes.

It’s so amazing! Seriously, why have we not done this yet?  They even had a fund raiser that brought in 2 million dollars.  Let’s see this happen folks!

The second thing I would do would be to change the prisons. We have so many prisoners now days.  And I fear that it is because life in prison is so much easier then in the real world.  Prisoners have television, junk food, a promise of three meals a day, and a place to put their head at night.  Sure other things go on in prison that we don’t want to talk about, but it doesn’t seem to stop the people that are locked up time after time for the same dumb stuff.

A prison cell is pictured inside Alcatra

I say we take away the television and junk food.  They still get three meals, but nothing fancy (which I am sure it’s not fancy now). While they are outside, make it like a gym class.  They all do the same stretches and work out and they won’t have time to sit around and talk.  Meals should be eaten in silence.  Let’s give the prisoners A.C. and heat, but just to the point where they are not sweating or freezing to death.

Prison should be hard and discourage someone from doing what they did all over again.

The third thing I would do as president is take the money I would save from taking things away from prison and put it into helping the homeless.  Homeless shelters and half way houses.  Now, it wouldn’t just be homeless shelters were people can just hang out and not care.  There would be rules and all that, but that would be a whole post worth of  things I would do.

I would also put more of that money into schools.  Of course, after the solar roadways are in place and in use, there would be a ton more money sitting around to go to other things that are more worth while then paving over the same road a million times.

I know that I will never be president, unless I get some unnatural following and everyone writes me in when they vote.  I also have no idea how the whole political world works because I just can’t deal with drama and that seems to be all it is…drama.  I left drama back in high school and I don’t feel like getting back into it.

So what would you do?  If you found yourself in charge of a country or even the world, what would be your first task?

Magical Reunion

Last night I went to my 10 year high school reunion.  I posted about how nervous I was yesterday.  I had nothing to be nervous about! The night was fantastic.

I got there and everyone remembered me, but I only remembered half of them.  I guess I made a bigger impression than I thought.  Of course, my outfit gave me a little confidence.

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I was in love with my shoes.

As soon as I got there some guy asked me to dance.  Shocker…right?  I went straight to the dance floor. The guy was cute and I love to dance, it was a no brainer.

After I danced a little bit I sat down with my friends and just talked a little bit.  I had so many people coming up to me to say hey.  It was crazy.  The table I sat at stayed crowded all night.

Then, the moment I had been waiting on.  My crush from high school finally walked in.  He looked as stunning as always.  I had to make him see me so I headed back to the dance floor with some friends.  My feet were killing me by this time, but I they are so cute I just couldn’t take them off.

I watched my crush make his way around the room, catching up with all his friends.  I had almost given up hope of him noticing me.  I was just about to walk off the dance floor when the electric slide came on.  I was begged to stay on the floor.  When we got around the first time I almost tripped because my crush had walked up right beside me.  He was right there! Dancing to the song.  I tried not to stare at him, but he noticed me.

Then he introduced himself to me.  I smiled…and giggled and told him I knew who he was.  A slow song started playing and he wasted no time asking me to dance.  Who could say no to their high school crush.  The guy who was just as gorgeous now as he was when I was in high school.

As the night went on him and I danced to so many songs.  We talked and laughed.  He even said he was sorry he didn’t notice me in high school.  We were the last ones at the reunion.  I had went to the reunion with a few friends, they rode with me, but another friend took them home for me.  I have some awesome friends.

Eventually, me and this amazing guy I had been in love with since second grade, we were kicked out.  It was around midnight.  We decided to go to IHOP to continue the night.  We parted ways around 2 am with a promise to get together again Tuesday.  He is going to meet me at the dog park that I take my puppy to.

It was a magical night

And none of that was true.

The only thing that was true was that my outfit was pretty awesome and I hate that I wasted it on such a boring and uneventful night.

I went in with a group of friends.  The people checking names at the door knew all my friends names, but had to ask me what my name was.  The people that I did talk to I didn’t know, the only reason they were around my table was because they all knew my friend.

I have told you all before, in high school I was the girl who wore black and hid in the corner.  I had a few friends, but none of them were at the reunion.  We were actually missing most of our graduating class.  And to make things even worse, my high school crush didn’t even show up.  The night was a complete and total bust.

Dreams…What Does it All Mean?

First, I would like to apologize for not having part of my short story up.  This week got away with me with all the excitement of a new job and I never got around to writing it. To make up for it I will try my best to have two parts next week.  Hopefully I can pull it off.  Of course, if I just crack down on myself it will totally be possible.

On to my topic today. Dreams.  Not the dreams we strive for, like becoming a published author, or owning my own bakery.  I’m talking about the wonderfully vivid dreams we have when we close our eyes at night…or during to day for naps.  The dreams that we have no control over unless you have gone through some kind of training to control them.  The dreams that tease us with the things we want and make it feel so real that you sometimes can’t tell if it was a dream or not.

I have a lot of vivid dreams.  They are full of monsters, distress, romance, and just plain nonsense.

Last night I had a dream that I was some kind of monster that hid as a human.  When I got angry or scared I would transform into this monster like thing with long nails, reptile skin, and could climb up walls.  I was a part of some kind of organization that helped others like me.  Not an X-Man kind of thing, we were all monsters hidden as humans.  I was learning to control my change and found that there were way more people like me than I thought.

I some how ended up back at headquarters with new knives for throwing.  I shared with you all once that I one of my hobbies is throwing knives, so this part at least made sense.

Headquarters ended up being home and I met up with my boyfriend who had no idea that I was some kind of monster.  Then there was a baby that belonged to someone, that I ended up taking care of.

It was just a mess of scenes that didn’t connect, but when I woke up I was just annoyed and angry.  I’m not even sure what part I was angry about.  The part where I was actually someone important or different, or the part where I had a cute boyfriend.

I know, I complain a lot about the whole single situation.  It’s not as bad as I make it out to be, I just feel like I am missing out on something.

Back to dreams.

All of my dreams seem to be this mess of chaos.  Everything happens within seconds and I try so hard to hang on to the dreams.  Which might actually be the reason I wake up in a bad mood.  I am trying to hold on to something, just to watch it slip through my fingers.

Do you think dreams mean anything? My most vivid dreams I always look up meanings of the things that stand out the most in my dreams. Though, I can never find a sure answer because my dreams are so strange.

On the bright side, my dreams do make for some interesting stories. Sometimes I will wake up still filling in the details of the dream that wasn’t there.  Things that I think should have happened or made sense with the non-sense dream I just had.

Do you have vivid dreams?  Do you write them down or try to remember them?  Do they frustrate you?  Do you sometimes forget what happened in real life and what happened in your dream?  I would love to hear your opinions on dreams.

Still Dreaming

When I first lost my job I thought I would lose the ability to dream and write.  I thought that the experiences that I had at work and around people helped me be a better dreamer, but I was so wrong.  The stress from my job actually caused me to dream less.  I started dreaming about ways to escape from my situation.  My dreams had become lazy!

I remember dreaming that I would hit the lottery and I would never have to work again.  I still have that dream, but it’s not the most important dream floating around in my head anymore.  I would dream that I found this gorgeous rich guy who would fall madly in love with me.  We would get married and I would never have to work again.  I still dream of falling in love with a gorgeous man with long hair and bright blue eyes (is that too specific?) but he doesn’t have to be rich.  I still joke about falling in love with a rich man, but not so I can escape my job.

The thing is, I don’t dream of ways to escape my job anymore.  I don’t dream of someone else saving me.  I dream of my own talents coming to life and saving myself.  I dream of becoming a best selling author and meeting Stephen King.  I dream of having my own publishing company so I can help new authors all over the world.  I dream of finding I have magic powers and joining a group of amazing friends to fight the bad guys of the world.

I have so many more dreams floating around in my head.  My imagination has even gotten stronger.  I no longer see the cute guy in the store as just a cute guy.  He is actually a vampire junky, looking for fresh blood for his master.  And the girl that stands outside asking for money is actually trying to get back to her mother, who is a powerful witch, so they can destroy the coven that has banned her for using black magic.  There is also the small quiet child who will grow up to find out he is actually a king from another planet, and he was sent to earth for protection, but on his 18th birthday he will have to return to save his people.

My dreams and my imagination may take me on crazy rides upon flying dolphins, and my allies may be vampires who only drink the blood of criminals, but it’s what I like the most about being me.  I can go on crazy adventures with or without a book in front of me.  And now that I don’t have a job I have more time to develop the best parts of me!

Irrational Fears

I have a bit of a confession for everyone tonight.  I have never dated, never had a boyfriend, never been kissed, and never even held a boys hand.  But that isn’t the confession.

I told people for years that I was just too busy for a relationship.  I told them I needed to focus on my studies so I could get a good job and depend on myself.   That’s not the confession either.

The confession, I am absolutely terrified to date.  Not just the dating, but the whole flirting part.  The part where I get super close and comfy with someone that I don’t mind letting them invade my personal space.

Seriously, at my age, dating should be easy.  I should have gone a million dates, and kissed at least a few guys.  Heck, at least flirted a bit.  Oh, I flirted online, I was good at flirting online.  That was safer, no one could actually see me and I couldn’t stumble on my words.  When you flirt online, you write words.  That means you think about it, type it, read it, and change it when it sounds completely retarded.  In real life you can’t take back stupid words and you can’t hide the fact that you just stuttered.  Real life people can also see you blush. Yep, real life kind of sucks.

I am naturally awkward.  I have been the awkward weird girl all my life.  It doesn’t make it easy to make friends at all.  The friends I do have went through a lot of crap just to call me a friend.  I live in a world where fairies and dragons exist.  I have this wild fantasy that a vampire will find me one day.  And I won’t have to make him fall in love with me because he is already in love with me.  We just click, the end.  No silly dating and strange phone calls.

So there.  I have never been in a relationship because the idea terrifies me.  It’s even hard for my family to know me, how is some random guy going to get to know me.  Especially when I keep everyone at a distance.  I tend to push people away, just so they don’t get too close.  Yeah, it happens all the time in movies.  The girl pushes everyone away but there is that one guy that forces his way into her life and she falls in love with him.  At this point, that is what is going to happen to me.

I can’t even talk to a guy I find attractive, as I am sure I have already mentioned in a blog before.  I wouldn’t know what to do on a date.  My palms would sweat so I couldn’t hold his hand.  He would lean in for a kiss and I would be completely oblivious to his intentions.  Or, he would lean in for a kiss and I would giggle, then he would get all self conscious, and wonder what he has done wrong.  Then there is the chance that I could be head over heels for the guy, but not know how to show it and he would stop talking to me because he doesn’t think I am interested.

Why does the idea of dating have to be so confusing and scary.  Maybe it’s not even the dating thing that worries me, just the idea of letting someone get close.  There is also the fear of being completely crushed.

Of course, my fear doesn’t stop me from dreaming.  But my day dreams usually start with the guy bluntly telling me he is into me and wants to take me on a date.  On the date he will tell me he wants to hold my hand and he will ask if he can kiss me.  Everything straight forward because I am not good with hints.

I think I am doomed.  I should just go ahead and start planning adoption, because at this rate I will never get married.

Go on, laugh.  It really is kind of funny.  Sad, but funny.