Let’s Talk about Sex

Or rather lack of sex.  Just hang in there, this is not another blog about my current situation (completely single!)  I want to talk about this guy Elliot Rodger.  Have you heard of him?  You can check out this VIDEO over at gawker if you would like.

Basically this guy has lost his mind.  He is 22 years old, a virgin, and never been kissed.  Because of all of this he feels the need to get revenge on all the girls that have rejected him, by killing them.  He went into some college and killed 7 women in a drive by shooting, then killed himself.  His only reasoning for this is that he deserved love and sex from beautiful women.

Now, I am 28, a virgin, and never been kissed.  I can be an angry person sometimes, especially when I am battling one of my depression wars.  I get down on myself because I have never been kissed.  The whole virgin thing is a choice and I am proud to say that I am a virgin.

I will go through a list in my head of all the guys I have liked.  All the guys that have rejected me in some form or another.  I have had a lot of crushes in my life, so the list can get a little long.  Actually that is a lie.  It’s not that long because I don’t really hold a grudge.  If the guy doesn’t like me, it’s not his fault.

Of course this leads me to wondering what is wrong with me.  What did I do wrong?  Am I too ugly?  Am I too fat?  Am I too childish?  WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME?

Don’t worry, I know I am awesome, and while I could lose some weight it is not what is holding me back from finding love.  That is something that is rooted deep down inside, a glimmer of  “I’m just not ready to trust someone completely.”  Yep, I have found the cause to my singleness and it’s name is Heather.

Back to the topic.

My point is, I have never once thought about revenge on those that have rejected me.  I might have thought of punching him if he rejected me in a harsh way, but it would never go as far as killing.  Also, I never thought to get revenge on all men…just because a few have turned me down.  The only person I ever thought about hurting to the point of death, was myself.  Yes, at one point I was suicidal and I never thought to take anyone with me.

So, where does this kid get off telling the world that he is so great he deserves women and sex?  Before I saw his video I might have said “Oh, he is a cutie.”  But his whole attitude ruins any part that might have seemed attractive.

I feel like I am rambling so let me say a few more things and I will let you all get back to your day.

No one DESERVES love or sex.  Boys need to get this out of their head.  You may workout all the time to make yourself look fantastic, but that does not earn you the right to sleep with whoever.  When will the kids learn that it’s not about looks anymore.  It’s about personality!  Yes, looks can sometimes matter.  I mean, you have to be attracted to the person, but just because they are not beautiful doesn’t mean they are not a beautiful person.

I feel like I am going to stick my foot in my mouth if I continue on with that.

Let me put it this way.  You can be gorgeous, movie start status, and still look ugly.  Why?  Because beauty is also in your attitude and the way you treat others.  If you are rude and only care about yourself, that drops your beauty points to the bottom of the barrel.  Does any of this make sense?

Ugh, for a writer I sure am having a hard time explaining what is in my head.  I think I am just too emotionally attached to the whole thing.

I will end with this.  You don’t deserve love if you haven’t earned it.  And this kid…I feel sorry for him.  Not because he was a virgin, but because he was so lost in the world he felt like he deserved something without working for it.

3 thoughts on “Let’s Talk about Sex

  1. girlychristina says:

    That’s horrible what that guy did!! Such a childish act. You’re right, no one deserves sex. Neither do people who are married to one another, my husband doesn’t owe me sex, and neither I to him.
    Thank you for sharing such a personal aspect of your life. I think you have the right mindset when it comes to beauty and finding love.

    I always felt that if I were open to love, that love would come to me. For example, if you are reading a book in public, with headphones on, then no one will bother you since you are closed off. But if you were making eye contact, loosely involved in a magazine or something, it gives the opportunity for someone to approach you. Same goes to trusting people. By being available and approachable, you are trusting the world to love you. ❤

    Remember everyone is different and everyone has a different perspective on what beautiful and love is. But you're right, loving yourself first is most important! I hope this gave you some insight and made sense! lol!

    • Heather M. says:

      It all made sense. lol I am just learning the whole concept of being approachable. I tend to give people a look that scares them off…though I don’t do it on purpose. lol Thanks for commenting!

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