How Do You Know?

I think that a lot of authors have the same question rolling around in their heads: Am I a good writer?  You wonder if you told the story to the best of your ability, and you question if your best is good enough.  Maybe it is why a lot of wonderful stories will never see the light of day, because doubt will bury them in the dark and crush the heart of many.  We get so caught up in wondering if we are good enough to be noticed that we forget why we started writing in the first place.

I have been telling stories since I could form words, and probably even before then.  I probably told stories in my baby language that only other babies could understand.  I remember having to write a story when I was in elementary school.  I wanted to re-write Cinderella’s story, but I didn’t.  My dad told me a story and told me to use that story, so I did and I completely bombed the assignment.  Thanks dad…  But I remember running through my head how I wanted to re-write Cinderella.  I don’t even remember what I was going to write, but I was determined to make it different.

When I was even younger I would tell my grandmother (she passed away when I was four) about monsters and all kinds of other stories.  One story I told her about a monster who slapped me and I was so into the story that I actually slapped myself to show my grandmother how hard the monster hit me.  I was such a silly kid.  

I started writing a lot more in high school.  I was depressed and so angry (like most teenagers.)  I started writing poems and I wouldn’t share those poems today.  Not because they were bad, but because I was an evil teenager.  

After high school is when I got more into writing short stories and in college I started writing my first novel.  That novel is still waiting to be published because doubt has buried it deep.

I didn’t start writing to entertain people and make others happy.  I started writing for myself, to make myself happy and to release anger and depression.  I wrote my feelings on paper because it was too much to keep bottled up in my mind.  It wasn’t until I started sharing stories, and people said they liked them, that I decided I wanted to publish.  I decided I wanted to share my stories with the world, not to be famous, but because I wanted to share the joy I got from them.

The thing is, you shouldn’t base how good your writing is by others opinions.  Yeah, if you want to publish it will help to learn a few skills and to be able to write a good story, but don’t let doubt stop you.  I feel like if you enjoy your own story, than someone, somewhere, is going to like it too.  Don’t let doubt drag you down and don’t give up on your dreams.

If you dream of being one of the great authors of the world, shoot for the stars!  I know that is what I am doing.  I may not become a great author known by everyone, but I know that my stories will reach some one in their time of need.  I don’t want to be famous just to be famous.  I want to be famous so I can help others fight for their own dreams. I am good enough for me and right now that is all I need.


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