October, my favorite month. The smell of fall, the crunching of bright leaves, and awesome horror movies all over TV all month long. It should have started with a bang. I should have woke up excited and ready to get this month going.
As soon as I woke up this morning I wanted to call out of work. I wanted to turn my light back out and drift back into a dream world where everyday is as awesome as Halloween. Instead, I drug myself out of bed, hopped in the shower and got ready for work. I decided I would eat breakfast at work, so I rushed out of the house and to my car. I watched as all the cats came running out from under my car and onto the back porch.
I have so many black cats I could start and adoption agency for witches. I love all my black cats though. Especially Ash, he has brilliant green eyes and a bushy tail. We have a ton of kittens, which are the ones that sleep under my car.
Something kept telling me to look under my car, but I didn’t think I really needed too. The youngest kittens, the ones that didn’t know any better were already on the back porch. I started the car and waited. I tapped the breaks a few times to shake the car, the last warning to any cats left under my car.
Satisfied that no cats or kittens were left, I backed the car up.
That’s when it happened, the slight “pop” of my tire rolling over what I brushed off as a rock. Rocks sound like that sometimes, but something in me knew it wasn’t a rock. I kept backing up, and my headlights hit it. The last remaining kitten, that for some reason didn’t get the warnings. The poor kitten that didn’t even try to run, and had it’s poor head crushed by my car tire.
I watched it flail around, like it was trying to get up, but I am sure it was just the last of it’s nerves dying. Please, God, let it have been the last of its nerves dying. I keep trying to tell myself that it died instantly and felt no pain, but I just can’t bring myself to believe it.
I gave it all the usual warnings! All the other cats got it. It usually ran with the other kittens, not that you can tell them apart since they are mostly black. Yet, there it was, crushed. One of my black kittens is now gone, because I didn’t listen to my intuition and check under the car before I backed out.
I feel like such a horrible person. I love all my cats, even the ones that hiss and run from me. I am a cat lover. I take care of them. Why did it have to be my tire that crushed it? I can’t help but to feel sick, and I can’t get the image out of my head.
The worst part! The mother cat of this kitten went rushing to the flailing kitten. She actually ran to the dying baby…I just hope cats don’t hold grudges…I killed her baby!
So far, October is not off to a good start. Fingers crossed that it gets better. Maybe I can stop feeling so sick about the kitten, I mean, I have plenty more and I was getting to where buying food was super expensive. 😦
Cat lovers of the world, please forgive me.